Savile, Romney, Hamza – a terrible week for Guardianistas

This has been an awful week for Guardian readers (yes there are still some). But it started so well. At the beginning of the week, the Guardian was wetting its pants in delight as the public-sector unions’ whore Ed Miliband threw away his short trousers and suddenly became a man. Guardian readers (most being public-sector employees) must have been scouring the property pages as they salivated over the huge pay rises they’d get when Miliband and Balls took over in 2015. But then things went tits up in Guardianland.

First we found out that a sex-abuse ring had been operating for decades at the Guardianistas’ beloved BBC (which buys most copies of the Guardian) aimed at procuring under-age girls to be raped by DJs, popstars and BBC staff.

Then Mitt Romney wiped the floor with the Guardianistas’ hero Obama. Without his autocue, Obama the great orator turned into a lump of quivering, inarticulate jelly. While Romney, supposedly the king of gaffe, launched a prolongued and articulate assault on America’s do-nothing president.

And finally, another of the Guardianistas’ heroes – the repulsive, hate-filled, benefits-scrounging bag of excrement (in my opinion) Abu Hamza – was finally thrown out of the country. Handwringing Guardian journalists were left bleating inconsolably about how appalling US prisons were and how unfair it was that someone who loathes Britain and all Britain stands for should be sent to trial in the US.

But don’t worry, dear Guardianistas, you may have just had a bad week. But Cameron is such an arrogant, lying, incompetent fool and Osborne is such a pathetic joke that your man Miliband will almost definitely win in 2015. Then Miliband and Balls can finish the task that liar Brown so successfully pursued for 13 years – bankrupting Britain.