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McKinsey’s millionaire consultants mock our stupidity

The Labour and Tory governments’ favourite management consultancy, McKinsey, is pocketing millions or even tens of millions of pounds of our money imposing a top-down reorganisation of the NHS that will increase bureaucracy and waste. This is after the Tories promised us there would be no more top-down reorganisations of the NHS and that they would reduce NHS bureaucracy and waste. But judging from a song reportedly sung at a McKinsey consultants’ Christmas party, McKinsey’s millionaire consultants don’t think much of their clients -� us and our government. (I believe this should be sung to the tune of Hark the herald angels sing, repeating the last two lines of each verse as a chorus)

If you aim to get the best result
And maximum performance you want to see
Then you really should consult
A Management Consultancy
McKinsey management consultants are we
We take all our clients� money
We can earn many a million
Because our clients have no vision.
�If Process Redesign is what you will
And you think it�ll make a success of all you do
Then rely on us to send you a bill
While we redesign your processes for you.
We are from McKinsey � young, bright and flash
We take mountains of our clients� cash
We win lots of new clients rich and fine
When we go round flogging Process Redesign
We�ve got handouts and we�ve got flip charts
And dazzling PowerPoint presentations
And we blow clients away
With our brilliant explanations.
We are McKinsey�s little lackeys
Telling clients they�re in trouble is just one of our strategies
Our language is smart and makes our clients ill-at-ease
-����� It�s what we call �Consultantese�.
The culture at ��. is a real dead weight
But we crush resistance before it grows
We�re used to organisations in a dreadful state
Because, of course, we are Pros!
We are McKinsey�s real hard core
We are the ones who�ll win the war
Now we�re going to party and have fun because
Cheers! We�ve just got our bonuses from Santa Claus.

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